help.

11 posts, 6 voices

Back to Ask a Psychic!

I’m so sad. Why won’t God answer my prayers? I’m super lonely. I stay busy but I have no social life. All my friends have boyfriends or husbands. I’m 35. What is so wrong with me that I can’t find anyone who I would go for who likes me in return? Will things ever get better or is the rest of my life going to be crap?

I’ve tried to reply to this twice but it won’t let me…strange!

To make a long story short, it starts with you, Jenny. :)

You have to really love yourself before you can draw in the type of relationship that you are wanting. And if you are needing the relationship to give you permission to love and value yourself, well…that’s a good way to get and stay stuck (because if you need the relationship to love yourself, but you need to love yourself before you can attract the right relationship….yikes!). So at the risk of being redundant, the answer to your last question is that it’s largely up to you.

You don’t have to have a boyfriend to not be lonely. Pray for connection and intimacy and joy, but don’t try to control or dictate how it comes to you. :)

Things won’t ever change as long as you feel like a victim of your circumstances and continue to be afraid that, deep down, you are not really worthy of love. The ironic thing is that you are worthy of love – you are literally made of love! – and the only thing stopping you from experiencing yourself as such is your own beliefs and fears about how unlovable you might be.

Also, still holding on to that “twin flame runner”? A lot of “twin flame runners” are not twin flames at all, but are actually narcissists with an avoidant attachment style (Google it), who by definition can’t and won’t love others the way you want to be loved. They attract people with an anxious attachment style (again, Google this) and instead of engaging in a healthy relationship together, they get into this weird game of running and chasing that ultimately goes nowhere. People who have narcissism as a dominant personality feature value people not for who they are, but what they can offer them or lend them (i.e. they value superficial hotness or other lofty achievements in a significant other because that lends them some semblance of social power). Do you want to be basically used, or do you want to be loved for who you really are?

Granted we all have a little narcissism, and it’s a normal stage of personality development (i.e. narcissism is age-appropriate during childhood) – and we will always have an inner child – but a lot of people never grow out of it for various reasons and develop more mature aspects of the personality to manage and “parent” the inner child. They are just people who are emotionally like kids walking around in adult bodies. I was hung up on a “twin flame” for over three years and had countless psychics tell me that he loved me and he would be back, etc., until one day I had had enough and became willing to listen to the still small voice within me that had been quietly telling me that he had moved on a long time ago, that he was gone, and he wasn’t coming back, he wasn’t sorry about it – and he couldn’t give me what I want, anyway.

If you continue to allow the ghost of someone to take up valuable space and residence in your mind and heart, that will also block the new and better from coming in; and being willing to give so much of yourself to someone who isn’t giving anything back is also a signal or reflection of a lack of self-love, because it’s not loving to drain yourself for someone who doesn’t care about you enough to be there right now. A healthy relationship looks like two people coming together who are mutually invested in building something wonderful together. True love is a combination of intimacy, passion and commitment. If those components aren’t present in your relationship, but you want true love, you owe it to yourself to leave a dead-end situation and seek your true heart’s desire. We can’t make people change; they have to want to change on their own.

I hope this helps, Jenny. I can really understand where you’re coming from, and because of that, I know it will get better as soon as you become fully committed to and devoted to the one person who should matter the most to you in the entire Universe: You!

Also, just an aside…I’ve met some really great people on here who have really helped me, and some have become friends. But by and large, after spending thousands of dollars on psychic readings over the past 8-9 years, I can honestly say that predictions made in most readings did not pan out. I could speculate on why that is, but at the end of the day, I think the takeaway point is that it is possible to get to a place where we really don’t need anything outside of ourselves to feel at peace and to feel happy. Most of the time when I’ve felt like I needed a psychic reading, it was because I was lacking in faith and fearing for my survival on some level (...typically the survival of my ego-based goals and needs). And it’s not really possible to be focused on the survival of ego-based needs and to be experiencing one’s self as Presence and feeling centered in self-love and faith in the Universe at the same time, eh?

^^ Oh here we go with that love yourself bullshit. Do you truly think everyone in relationships truly loves themselves and are happy completely with themselves?? Love being kept from people because they dont “love themself” is bullshit, like it’s some kind of sin. I’m sorry, but that sounds like a crock of shit to me. I love myself. I think I am awesome. I am a good person and I am kind to the men I date. But Guess what? They wont commit to me no matter how nice, kind, how much time and money I drop on them, how much I recognize what a great woman I AM and like myself as a person. nobody is perfect. The loving yourself shit is ridiculous already. There’s not ONE person in this world or universe that loves EVERYTHING about themself. That;s a bullshit answer. Sorry. Jenny this person doesnt know where you’re coming from. They got it all wrong. I am in your boat believe me. It’s not about loving or n ot loving yourself, it’s that we keep meeting the wrong men and men out here these days won’t commit. Its an epidemic.

People stating it is basically a SIN and love should be held from you if you dont love every single thing about yourself is a joke already. Save it for the circus. Everybody is insecure about SOMETHING. But they all are in relationships and happy ones if that.

Lady, she’s not wanting a relationship to complete her, like me, shes looking for companionship because your tired of being lonely and want to do couple partnership things, tired of not getting sexually gratified and having someone to share your hopes and dreams with in your mid 30s like myself. Family no longer hangs out with you anymore and your friends are all paired up and do everything with their SO’s. Its time to leave the nest in your life, but your partner bird aitn showin’ up. THATS what this is all about. So you begin to wonder why and your bored and there’s no relief. You can only spend so much time by yourself. Its a human need to want to reproduce and find partnership. Its what keeps us alive. People dont get that,

Jenny is welcome to take or leave anything I’ve said here, as are you! It was meant with the best of intentions.

Hay Jenny Can I just say I think your doing well. I’m happy to see you have joined some twin groups on FB. I’ll just say the one your in I’m not sure of there many healers there. You should try another one with healers. There some amazing people in them groups. I’d just suggest you get one of them you find to check your chakras & energy. They will be honest & won’t charge the earth. Also I think reinki may help that you can also find in groups. God will answer he’s just lineing it all up. These things take time. Relax let go enjoy life. To a degree it does hinge on self love. They say the more you carefore & love you’reself your twin feels it. I’m still sorting all my mess out so I don’t Have all the answers to twin connections. I know I love mine & he sends love back. Also I know it’s my crap holding us up. I’m working threw all this. Well both get to where we wanna be Jenny just keep faith & love in your heart for your twin. He’ll feel it. Just keep working on your sekf it’s really all you can do right now. There some great reinki clips on your tube as well if you want to try them.. Also go to Mystic Moon Women Chanel. She’s beyond amazing & a true healer. I wish you luck in all that comes up.

Hi Im Juliana I SPecialize In Love But Also Can Help In All Aspects In Life My REadings Will Give You Detailed And Honest Information With Just Your Name And Dob I DO Not Sugar Coat Im Here To Give Honest Answers Dont Delay Contact Me Today I Have Valentines Day Specials

I’m sorry but I agree with Tanya. I like myself and have a lot of confidence. I enjoy being alone but not all the time. I WANT a boyfriend I don’t need one but want one. Huge difference.. My twin is not a narcissist. In fact he’s unemployed and embarrassed to reach out. His ex girlfriends were gold diggers. Not me.. I have lots to offer him which they can’t or couldn’t. Hope this makes sense.

I also always say I’m too pretty to be single. I come from a good family. I volunteer at three places, pet sit for work and watch three boys weekly. I have a purpose but seeing everyone with someone makes me feel sad because I want that too. I could survive without it but I want it. Who wants to be alone? Some do and some don’t I don’t.

Why worry, wait or wonder? Call me now for clarity!I will tell you exactly what is going to happen and how to fix every problem. $10 Special For 10 mins. i would be happy to help..

Love, Light & Blessings.

-Gina

I see. In that case, I sincerely wish you the best. :)

I also know I am loveable. I used to settle for men but not anymore. That’s why I like the guy I last saw in March so much. We had a wonderful connection.. He was let go from his job and I never saw him again. I wrote him a Christmas card. I still believe he will contact and am open to meeting someone new as well.